Sunday, June 6, 2010

In focus

I can't help but think of how hard it is to face a blank page right now.

I won't exactly call it writer's block because I know I have so many things to say, to share - I just can't organize it quickly it enough. Sometimes, it takes me many minutes to hours at most just to come up with a single decent write-up in front of the computer. My mind just seems to shut down on its own when forced to squeeze out its deepest musings and reflections. (Or maybe, my mind is simply too old fashioned for computer applications and cyberspace.)

On the other hand, I find it much, much easier to think about what I want to say in a crystal clear way while riding the car or the bus during long commutes. When I'm simply thinking for the sake of thinking (not for the sake of publication), my mind flows richly and uninterruptedly. If only the brain had it's own word-for-word recording device that you can just switch on and off automatically.

My thoughts, more importantly, come out more spontaneously when I'm in deep conversation with somebody: a family member, a friend, or a kindred spirit. Surely, the human-ness in the connection provides the perfect atmosphere for a worthwhile and meaningful engagement.

As I turn off the lights tonight, I continue to ponder about questions in life that most people want answered. I continue to think about things other people usually think about and those things that most people also do not even bother to try and think about.

Lights off now... and many parts of me went away with it.

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